NEW LOVE TREND OR MULTIPLE LOVES

They are more and more talking about them, shaking conventions and the romantic vision of love. They are neither swingers nor libertines but they claim the possibility of loving several people at once. These are the polyamoureux. This way of apprehending the couple is not defined either as "the trouble" like some love trios. No, the polyamoureux have several partners at the same time but without becoming polygamous

But how are they doing?

What is the difference with polygamy?

It is indeed about sometimes polygamous couples with this nuance that to love several people at the same time is not the privilege of the man. With a tacit contract everyone accepts the other's relationships. Most often, there is a pivotal couple on which are added other stories. So, together, we decide to meet the other or not, to allow him to come home, etc. All this little world does not live under the same roof, and even does not mix! Each member of the couple is only allowed to love someone else. sporty, we are far from the fusional love of the couple. Have more

Or even we share the pleasures. With one we want a child, with the other we share his passion for sport, we are far from the fusion love of the couple to two. Having several lovers (his) would thus avoid the couple frustration.ours lovers (his) and avoid the couple frustration.

Still marginal at the time of the "polyfidelity" pact of Sartre and Beauvoir, "open" love would not be the prerogative of artistico-boos. In France, polys cafes, sites, workshops and conferences are opening up, which support plural loves. This This phenomenon is the result of a general movement in favor of individual freedom advocated by our society but which also coincides with a need and a sense of security. Many are divorce children tempted to invent a new way of loving. "

Polyamor could also be explained by the emergence of new lifestyles such as geographically distant work, separate housing, the mediation of coparents ... ended life in a fusional way.

A bulwark to frustration, really?

For some psychiatrists it is rather a leap forward, and especially an instrumentalization because "to seek to satisfy such passion with one, so with the other, and thus avoid being confronted with frustration or emptiness, we risk missing out on all relationships , warns psychiatrist Bernard Geberowicz *. In this configuration, everyone's emotional and emotional investment load is reduced, not to mention that this somewhat utilitarian conception of its partners can be likened to instrumentalisation. " Polyamers avoid the risk of fusion, but also lose intensity

But according to a US study ** (** Study conducted in 2012 on 4 000 polyamoureux for Loving More), there would be many more women willing to be polyamorous than men (49.5% against 35.4%) .

A question of temperament but also of dominant culture, men would be caught faster by the cross of the rivalry ...



Emily Jackson for DayNewsWorld